Sorrow tracks history, both yours and mine. Amplified today by politicians and bullies, scapegoating others for their own corruption, inhumanity, and stupidity. All around the world.

From my third high-school boyfriend, who came to America in a huge ship, cradled in his former concentration camp mother’s arms accompanied with her former concentration camp husband, 1950, the same year I was born. A later boyfriend never talked of his Jewish family heritage. All I knew in high school was I preferred Jews and Catholics (as I was) because Jewish boys were much smarter than many others. Nor did I inquire of my Jewish guitar player friend’s heritage, a man I loved in Chicago, who was also a fantastic comedian. Nor did I ask of my German friend in Los Angeles, who never allowed me to see him as the alcoholic he was. He educated me, that Germans, or any other nationality, who leave their homeland, are very different from the ones who remain.

One anti-immigrant German recently stated on television that eventually German DNA would die out from multiple immigrant children. I rejoiced! Only later to be saddened when others disproved his theory.

No Catholic has been persecuted when pedophilia and the Catholic Church covered front pages of newspapers. Around the world. Thus why are people of Jewish descent around the world again being persecuted about a country many have little connection, love or interest in?

My own DNA is more than two-thirds Irish. I forgave the UK for enslaving Ireland for a few centuries. Then I learned it was a thousand years! No forgiveness ever. Even in the 1980s, the UK discriminated against the Irish in employment; as well as Blacks, as an Irish employment agency agent confided to me.

How has the UK and its ‘sun never sets’ Empire redeem itself despite its horrors upon its colonies? Most of its shocking misdeeds have been hidden by royal advertisements for tourists. I had to stop reading the book Scramble for Africa after learning what Belgium had done in the Congo. Belgium chocolate forever lost its flavor. However, I met a woman who told me how her father, a white doctor in South Africa, accidentally drove too close to an African on a bicycle. The young Black child fell. Her father exited the car to help him. A South African police officer drove by and ordered him to stop bandaging the boy’s leg! That no white person was to touch a Black African, even to help him. The woman also told me, when she or anyone gave a sweet or money to a Black child or adult, the Black person was forced to kneel and hold both hands over their heads, palms up, to say thank you. She joined apartheid protests but was forced to flee to Portugal after being jailed twice to avoid more serious punishment. This last century, less than fifty years ago. South Africa, ruled by the British Empire.

Holocaust deniers? I sat with a slightly younger Polish boyfriend, in a movie theater, exposing the camps shoveling naked, desiccated bodies into mass graves. I worried his fascination exposed an inner evil, but I too had already seen such films and did not like reruns of such horrors. Like the war in Ukraine. Nor did I question his Polish heritage, unaware many German concentration camps had resided in Poland. When I did ask him when the Catholic Pope was Polish, if it helped make many of the anti-Polish jokes less painful. “Yes,” he responded.

Parents, loved ones, others, on television, express sorrow when loved ones die. Germans? Brits? Americans? To my shock, in the 1970s, a French bartender insisted he held no fury towards the Germans. He shrugged at my shock. “They’re our neighbors. We can’t keep hatred towards neighbors.” But what the French did in colonizing Viet Nam was as horrifying as the British Empire.

The Jewish homeland should have been a wealthy part of Germany. Not an Arab land far, far away with thousands of years of Arab habitation. Like Germans, the Jews partitioned, then Polish ghetto wall enclosed the Palestinians. Then killed thousands more for a few hundred killed; not unlike Germans in camps who killed 100 for every one concentration camp escapee. Illegal settlements, left appeased Jews free to continue to steal Palestinian land.

Yes, Americans are responsible. The US president proclaimed that few Arab voters resided in the USA whereas many German descendants voted. Thus, give Jews Arab-Palestinian land.

A small bit of my ancestry is Prussian. Which was invisible on maps. A few removed cousin from 1867 or so was German. Her ancestry showed connection to a Civil War survivor. Another of my paternal-mother’s ancestors was a signer of the USA Declaration of Independence. In 1492, Jews were banished by Queen Isabella or forced to convert to Christianity. The Spanish Inquisition, the European mass murder of women labeled ‘witches’, even Ancient Egypt’s enslavement of foreigners whose leaders lost wars, to Myanmar’s mass murderers, to guilty Nazi escapees to South America, taking with them their un-mistakable hatred and corruption to new lands.

The Jews should have been bequeathed a wealthy part of Germany while the Palestinians should have kept their lands and deeds hundreds of years old. Should Americans return New York to the Native American Indians?

Now Germany seems to rule the European Union, having overcompensated for its holocaust by accepting millions of immigrants. France too. But their welcome didn’t extend to acceptance into the culture, nor should it. Uneducated immigrants failed to understand how to assimilate and abandon their medieval views of women and life. Nor did guilty Germans welcome them into their culture. Rather, they allowed Arabs to retain their uneducated views and ‘cultural’ enslavement of women.

Once Europeans divided the entire African country for itself, so vividly explained in Scramble for Africa from the 1833-1914 in ‘new colonisation’ envisioned by the Berlin Treaty. Now those same exploited descendants have invaded their destroyers, and the heartbeat of history continues.

By Hogweard – Africa map 1935.svg, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=142002937

Naked, I sat up from a bed I had just shared with a man, nationality forgotten, but a psychology major like myself. He asked me if I wanted him to kill me. Perhaps I had confided in my suicidal feelings during our LSD-and-lovemaking session. He had reached towards a beside table, about to open a drawer, telling me he had a knife there. I pushed him off me and the bed. He then started prancing and pontificating.

I reasoned. Unafraid, for how could a lover kill me? I told him, “I too have evil within me just like you do. If I were to assemble all its pieces together, it might be greater than yours. We could wage war.” Although female and aware any man, no matter how small, had massively powerful muscles compared to mine, I was confident about my brain’s power.

“And it would be a bloody mess. We would probably both die. A waste of time and energy.”

He stood still. Momentarily surprised. “How do you know that?” he demanded.

Dreamstime.com

I shrugged. “Because I know myself. I’ve had to assemble it. Nowadays, I keep it in small, manageable pieces to avoid self-destruction.”

“How do you do that?”

I slapped the side of the bed next to me. “Come here. Kiss me. I’ll show you.”

Nowadays, I Musk-like wish I could enable a satellite circling the globe with an-anti-hate laser. So it could pinpoint each and every human whose evil outweighs its good and vaporize them. Covid dead were 80% over 80 years old, thus liberating many Chinese women from caring for parents, parents-in-laws and husbands and children. But they had already stopped that by not marrying. Kenya, with the help of Peace Corps workers, limited their over population, but once the Peace Corps was exiled, population and violent exploits exploded. Sudanese, once Egyptian slaves, now kill each other. Perhaps the satellite could also allow BOTH men and women only reproduce twice. Thus wars for resources might also die. And humans would stop inventing silly reasons to kill each other.